When anger and shouting at your kids becomes an almost daily event you might start to wonder: Why am I so angry all the time? And how can I stop this?!

In this week’s blog I’ve distilled down the deeper reasons why we parents can feel SO angry with our kids. If you can understand what’s really triggering your anger and reactivity, you’re in a much better position to heal yourself from it.

Essentially we are taking whatever happens with our kids very personally. When we’re upset, the situation has become all about us (in our minds, at least!).

In case you think you’re the only one who get angry with their kids… let me confess. A few weeks ago I lost it with my daughter.

So I totally understand why YOU get angry with your kids!

In the midst of your child being a nightmare, it’s natural to get angry!

Well in this two-part blog post I’m going to explain why you’re really getting triggered and angry with your kids. I’m going to help you work out what’s underneath the anger so you can heal it.

And I’ll give you five simple ways to help stop shouting and turning into a monster when your kids are difficult.

Have you thought about taking your kids on a long trip? Or you’ve done it and it was a nightmare?! This article gives you some practical tips on how to make it easier and more fun! 

After a whole year travelling through the New Zealand, USA, Ecuador and the UK I’ve learnt a thing or two about helping kids (and therefore parents) enjoy travel! 

Here are my top tips to enjoy the ride.

So many parents tell me that getting their toddlers and preschoolers to stay in bed at night is a real challenge. For many parents, bedtime is a battle and the evenings are so loooong, as their child just keeps getting up or calling out. 

The good news is that there is a LOT you can do to help them want to stay in bed and actually go to sleep! 

Click through to find out WHY your child is resisting bed time - and what you can do to help them get off to sleep sooner.

I know what it’s like to feel so embarrassed as my kid is screaming and crying in the supermarket over a box of teddy bear cookies and the whole shop is staring at us!

I know the panic feeling when you’re not sure how to react – should I get strict with her to get her to be quiet? Or if I cuddle her enough will she calm down? What will work?!

Shouldn’t I be able to calm her down and get her to be quiet? I’m her mother! And what did I do wrong that caused her to lose it like this?!

Well it doesn't have to be this hard! And I'd like to help you make your child's meltdowns easier and fewer.

Did you know that the majority of parents think that spanking is sometimes or often a good idea?  

But scientific research tells us is that spanking is not good for your child’s development – it does hurt them in the short AND long term.

And what’s more, it doesn’t even improve their behaviour!

If you’ve ever had to deal with the in-laws, your parents or even your partner telling you your child needs a “good, hard spanking”, I want to empower you with the facts so you can tell them they are wrong!

What’s the hardest thing about being a parent? Do you think I’m going to say “lack of sleep”?! For me that’s definitely been up there as a massive challenge.

But, No! The hardest thing about parenting is the stress of believing that there’s something wrong with our kids and blaming ourselves for it.

When our toddler has a tantrum or our baby won’t sleep at night or our preschooler won’t eat dinner night after night, we can suffer so much about these things.

Want to know why we suffer and what you can do about it?

One of the THE most common questions I hear from parents with kids under 5 - how do I keep my child occupied so I can get stuff done?! 

Letting the kids watch some TV is how many parents get a moment's peace to cook dinner/make calls/do housework. But what if there are other more creative games that your kids could focus on without needing you?

I've put together a guide for you: How to Keep Kids Occupied So You Can Get Stuff Done! 

Now I consider myself a total expert in this area! Not just because I’ve done a load of research into this area, but mainly because I have a super-strong-willed daughter who will not just DO something when you ask. No, that would be too simple…. :-)

But I’ve found the way to get her to co-operate with what I need her to do (most of the time!). So here are the tactics that really work.

When your child screams "I hate you!" and hits you, it's possibly the most difficult time ever to be nice to them! Would you agree?! 

We feel hurt - in our heart and on our bruised leg. At this point, it’s pretty hard to empathise with your child and be calm and kind.

So why should we parents be sympathetic with our kids when they say they hate us and turn into crazed balls of aggression?! And how can we not react to our own upset at being hit or screamed at?

Every one of us is susceptible to getting addicted to social media, texting, email or Netflix.

And our kids are even more likely to get addicted, given the chance. They have even less awareness of what they're doing and certainly couldn't care less about the downsides of screen time!

But I want us to stop beating ourselves up about this! It's not the kids' fault and it's not our fault we all tend towards getting addicted.

Want to know why - and what we can do about it?

Today I want to share with you my top 3 favourite parenting books!

When I was a new mama and didn’t know what I was doing, these books saved me. From the knowledge in these books, I learnt how to handle my daughter’s big emotions and her stubborn behaviours and calm her down. I found guidance to parent in ways that aligned with my values – like using love and connection rather than fear and punishment to get my child through every day tasks.

Read on for my top 3 books!

What is it with the hitting?! If your child is anything like mine, he or she sometimes gets into an out-of-control hitting frenzy. It could be only occasional, or maybe it’s turned into a real phase.

Actually this is very common – and it’s completely normal behaviour for toddlers and preschool kids (and even school-age kids).

So why is the hitting happening? And what can we do about it.

Have you ever been embarrassed by your kids' wild behaviour compared to all the other "angels" at playgroup or kinder? Or seen the calm, happy family in the park and wished your family was like that? You could be suffering from Comparisonitis!

Today I’m going to give you 3 reasons why avoiding Comparisonitis will make you much happier, and 3 ways you can cure yourself of it.

Play for kids so important – they need it to feel FREEDOM. They need it to learn and make sense of their world. And, of course, they want to have fun!

But, as I’ve being finding, play is also a key way to help them calm down and feel in charge of their own little lives – which results in better behaviour.

So if you’re struggling with your child constantly refusing to do what you ask and pushing back against all your plans, try giving them more free play – it may just help!

Are you sick of the battles with your kids every time you want them to do something? Would you like to find a calmer way to get through every day with them?!

Today I have a step-by-step guide for you to shift the dynamic with your kids from conflict and battle, to calm and loving instead.

Plus, I’ve got a downloadable Cheat Sheet “6 ways to Shift from Battle to Calm” full of specific strategies you can use to shift the dynamic when you’re in the heat of the moment trying to get your kids to do something!

I’ve got to be honest with you: of all the challenges of parenting, I find trying to keep the spark in my marriage to be the hardest. Where does romance and fun with our partners fit in when life is just consumed by the kids’ needs, the lack of sleep and the mountains of washing?!

I know I’m not alone in finding this a challenge.

So what can we do about it? How can we regain that spark?

On those days where you’re really feeling anxious or flat, it can be hard to get out of that hole – especially when you just can’t take a break from parenting to do something nice for yourself.

Well, I have a practice to help you feel better on those days - but which will also help you build the skill of feeing good on a daily basis. And it’s proven by science to actually work!

Today I want to tell you about what happens in OUR heads when our kids stress us out and we lose it! What's going on when parents get so triggered that we yell, get rough or punish our children? And what can we do about it?!

When we were visiting family friends recently: 5yo Johnny says: “I don’t want the pink plate, I want the green one. Gemma took my green plate!“ Tears, screeching and then hits his sister Gemma.

It’s amazing how little things can so upset a young child, isn’t it?! 

So what’s happening – why do kids react like this? What's actually going on in their brains?!

Does “parenting doubt” plague you? Often wondering whether your parenting choices are the right ones?

It’s hard to feel sure about your choices when you see another parent doing things differently and their child seems so much better behaved than yours. Or when your mother-in-law comments how your child is “a handful, isn’t he?”   

Today I want to help you feel confident about your choices and let go of any nagging doubts. I believe there are two main ways to know if how you’re parenting is ‘right’ or not.

Do you have times where your kids are just bouncing off the walls or being hyperactive or rough? They don’t seem to listen to anything we say and just do frustrating things like throwing, hitting or running away.

For a tired parent these times can be really challenging. Sticking the kids in front of the TV or iPad can seem like a quick fix, but often they’re even worse when it’s time to turn it off and they have a massive meltdown when you try and switch it off!

So here are five quick and simple ways to calm your kids down when you need it (that don’t involve a screen)!

Has your child ever gone through a difficult stage - where they have become angry, aggressive, and totally unreasonable for weeks on end..? These phases are usually due to a big life change or a developmental leap that is stressing your child's emotional and physical system.

Parenting is hard enough, so why do we have to deal with these difficult stages and what can we do about it?

Have you heard the modern parenting advice not to say to your kids “You’re a good girl” or “You’re a bad boy”? Instead we are told to focus on the child’s actions.

But saying “good girl” and “good boy” is almost a reflex action for most people of all ages – it’s hard to break. And what really is the harm?

Well, here’s the thing. Your kids don’t have a perception about themselves as a separate entity who is either good, bad, clever or stupid. It’s never occurred to them. So when we use this kind of language we are literally creating their sense of self for them – we are teaching them who they are with our words. 

So what should we say?!

I was asked a really important question from a mother who wanted to know what's best to do when her child hits or hurts their siblings or other children:

“What about the other child they have hurt? Shouldn’t we be giving them all the attention, not the naughty one?”

The answer is that both need your attention!

Let’s say your child hits his little brother, who is now crying. Here’s what you can do.